2 notes doesnt pay the rent
f is for friends who do stuff without you
u is for uninvited
c is for clinging onto hope that you wont keep getting forgotten
k is for krispy kreme yum
this is not what i wanted this post to turn out like
one time i got in the shower and came out and no one was home and the lights were off, my entire family went bowling and forgot about me
DOWN HERE IN THE DEEP BLUE SEA
we’re halfway thru april, u know what tht means?
HOW DOES THIS MAKE ME LAUGH EVERY FUCKING YEAR!?
We’ve all had that awkward moment where we accidentally touched our friend’s boob
Why is it awkward
so im shopping for make up for the girlfriend bc valentines day and holy fuck how do you girls afford this shit
$80 for eye shadow???
is it made out of unicorn shit
what is naked 3
why is it called naked
will it make her look naked
why is it $50
that’s 50 cheese burgers
i can’t deal with make up good bye
what do you call a message sent by a girl?
i got 7 messages saying this joke is offensive & that i’m the reason feminism exists
the inside of your butt is warm enough to hardboil an egg
oh no I’m not falling for this one again
lets play a game called are u bad at texting back or do u hate me
are u printed on a popsicle stick? bc ur a joke
can’t handle these.
your url is making me nervous
you are not fat
you have fat
you also have fingernails
you are not fingernail
please don’t flirt with people i secretly like it’s rude and disrespectful